Be clear
Use simple and straightforward language tailored to their age and level of understanding. You might want to focus less on detailed anatomical or medical information and more on everyday effects like how the condition makes you feel, what things you can’t eat or why you might need to rest more than usual.
Be honest
The chances are that every now and then, your Crohn’s or Colitis will stop you going to school plays or taking them to football training. Explaining that your condition may be ‘up and down’ could help your kids understand that it won’t always affect you in the same way, and that you’ll have both good days and bad. You can explain that it’s the illness stopping you from doing things - it’s not that you don’t want to see their school play. Be honest and try not to make promises that you may not be able to keep.
Reassure them
Your condition may make you more tired and easily irritated, but this isn’t their fault and it doesn’t mean that you don’t love them, or that you’ll stop caring for them. Just like they feel grumpy or unwell sometimes, so do you.
Encourage openness
Asking your child questions can help them feel part of a discussion, for example, if they’re worried about anything in particular, or if there’s anything they want to know about your condition. Get them to ask questions too but don’t be afraid to say if you don’t know the answers. You can always try and find out the answer together, maybe by asking the doctor or nurse together at your next appointment.
You might find it helpful to use jokes to diffuse the tension when talking about potentially embarrassing topics, like farting. As one parent said: “if they could talk about bowels, they could talk about anything.”